This past week was one of those weeks in life that are never forgotten. We were summoned home to pay our final respects to my father in-laws mother Noreen, who had passed away. This was a trip that we knew would be coming, somehow even in understanding that it would be happening we were still unprepared. Hastily we made plans to drive the 1,000 miles one way to make our way back as soon as possible. Very soon our journey lay before us, with the van packed and fueled we embarked on our journey at just past 3:00 a.m.
Having four adults and two little ones packed into a van with a daunting drive ahead is all but a recipe for near disaster, thankfully it was anything but that. Instead it was a refreshing reminder of the power and love of family.
As we made our way during those dark hours of the morning my wife and mother in-law tried to sneak in some sleep with the little ones. Leaving me and my father in-law to keep each other awake and alert during the drive, as he drove he spoke a little about his mother, and a lot about the nuances of his family. I found myself bearing witness to things that I had not previously known in the sixteen years we have shared. The hours and the miles blurred by and the next thing we knew my son, daughter, wife, and mother in-law were awake; breathing an energy of renewal not only into our vehicle, but also into our lives.
We were making the trek home like I said to pay our final respects to Noreen, but what we didn't talk about was that we are walking pieces of her legacy, demonstrating that her life and family will go on, providing at least in some sense that while she is no longer with us, she is still with us. In the energy that everyone brought into the vehicle the overall mood was playful and light hearted, which I hope helped my father in-law in knowing that we were there to support him, as well as to hopefully remind him that life is to be celebrated.
As we pulled into Spearfish, South Dakota we all had weary minds and eyes; yet somehow there was a feeling that if we could choose to be anywhere, this is a pretty damn good place to be. We grabbed some much needed rest, then tried to burn off the reserve energy that the road hadn't sapped from us, in an effort to still feel human.
We grabbed dinner in a quaint little restaurant in Spearfish and romanticized the beauty of small town living. This would be a common theme throughout the trip, looking back with admiration, and to some degree a bit of longing. That would change though as we found it harder and harder to satisfy the conveniences we had become so accustomed to living in a larger community.
With full bellies and satisfied minds we sauntered off, stopping to grab some more much needed caffeine before retiring to the hotel for the night.
Typically I would have thought this would be the perfect opportunity for some much needed isolation from my in-laws, but not this time, and maybe not ever again.
Instead we did everything as a team, better said, as a family. We played with the children until fatigue set in to the point that we knew it best to make our arrangements for baths and bedtime.
As we set out in the early morning hours again the next morning there was an unspoken sense of what loomed in front of us, the real work of a grieving family, but also the appreciation for the powerful energy from our little traveling clan. We meandered our way through South Dakota and Wyoming, my father in-law sharing his stories, then when everyone woke up and the stories that were shared grew to be the telling of the fabric of a family, one sewn on smiles, laughs, tears, and miles. As we came into Montana the legends of previous trips filled the car, with look at this, and remember the time, or isn't that..... It was a beautiful energy.
After lunch I drifted off to sleep as my father in-law like a hawk identified all of the perfect locations for future log cabins. I was abruptly awoken as we almost slammed into an island barricade, my wife and mother in-law screaming to alert my father in-law of the pending doom, swiftly and skillfully he swerved to dodge the obstruction, all the while claiming to be in complete control.
It was the perfect way for us to roll into town, like a band of Griswold's barreling our way to our destination. We quickly got settled in and started making arrangements to link up with the other family members in town.
I'll leave it there for now, as the rest of the trip was spent fulfilling the purpose that got us rolling in the first place, honoring life and finding peace.
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